Chapter 9- Shirts, strenght, similies and syllables

THANK YOU EVA FOR THE AWSUM ILLUSTRATION/ Cover page

I love the lips

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Complimenting clothing is an act that has gone on for centuries. I am pretty sure the first child was conceived after Adam complimented Eve’s leaf. But I do want you to remember that while both me and Bobby Brown had our zippers down we were not going to go the Adam and Eve way.

So here I am- you know I hyped up the whole shirt thing so much and now next chapter I am talking about something else- that pretty lame, so lets just get back to that portion of the story. I will make this brief and to the point.

Descriptively speaking it was a pretty normal shirt. I am not much of a describer anyway, which reminds me- I have never decribed to you what Sam, my angel looks like. Sam is beautiful like a… I cant really think of a simile here, umm--- she was beautiful like a rose with breasts— You know who the hell cares what other thing looks like her- I mean—really its rather stupid…

Its like that guy who told me he felt like a thousand bucks- I don’t get that- Why cant he just say he felt happy, I would definitely understand that better- cause I know what it feels like to be happy but I have no idea what a thousand bucks feels like and I really think it depends on the thousands bucks- espiecielly with the inflation and exchange rate and what not who knows what kind of mood it is in.

So I am just going to say she was beautiful like a beautiful woman.

Back to my shirt- It was red and black and red and black- If I was to use a simile here I would say it was like that skunk that tried to cross the road, even had the smell. (No animals were hurt during the writing of this story).

I walk out the door quite pleased with my shirt. So pleased in fact, that I am lost in its psychedelic colors, so lost in fact that I don’t see where I am going. So not seeing where I am going in fact that walk straight into a wall.

Don’t you hate it when you are lost in your shirt and you think you have walked into a wall but the wall turns out to be a really built-up uberman?

What I hate even more than that is when the guy says

“ME BEAT YOU UP”

Really, that’s what he said. I think the muscles on his face didn’t allow him to use bigger words.

Strength and syllables can’t co-exist.