The story so far is quite simple, maybe even clichéd
BOY MEETS GIRL
GIRL IS Bi-SEXUAL
GIRL CALLS BOY A PERVERT
BOY’S SHIRT IS COMPLIMENTED UPON BY SOME GUY USING THE URINAL NAMED BOBBY BROWN EVEN THOUGH THAT IS NOT HIS NAME.
MOOSEMAN SITS ON BOY
The classic love story
And every classic love Story has a hero an in this case that hero would be SAM- MY HERO.
But alas Love is fickle, all she did was point and laugh.
Called her friends, threw stuff at me and took video of me on getting beaten up by Moose.
As I was being kicked in the balls by Moose I realized how much Love hurts.
Be it period pains or getting kicked in the balls the parts that give you the most pleasure are the parts that hurt the most. Our reproductive Organs are a metaphor from God, a metaphor for love, it is for this reason we use these organs to make love.
Love gives us most pleasure, gives us most Pain
Your boyfriend is your orgasm, your boyfriend is your period pain.
Without Love without sex there would be no Orgasm and nor would be there Period pain.
Let me tell you how horrible it felt to watching her mock me in my pain. Some would call it throwing salt on my wounds but let me give you a more appropriate example, keeping in mind the whole Knight in Shining armour imagery.
It was like the prince coming to save the Rupunzal and pulling out her hair or worse yet waxing it.
It was like Cinderella getting athlete foot
Sleeping beauty getting date raped
And as I watched her video tape me with my soon to be black eyes- I relasied how futile this existence is-
How Futile Life and love is-
Moose was my messiah
This worldly life wasn’t my cup of tea, I don’t even drink tea- Think of me as Lactose and caffeine intolerant.
There was no spiritual growth in life, this Mobile camera she was using was a way of taking us away from what’s truly important- technology was futile, it stoped me from growing (unless those emails have any truth in them)
This was it- this was a sign- A from God in the form of moose-
NO MORE WOMEN FOR ME
I WILL NOW REMAIN CHASTE-
7 comments:
wow...this was like brokeback mountain with a very literal broken back and no sex.
So you chose chastity over chasing love? Wise decision... until the penis starts to think. Then moose will steal your love and you - enraged - will have your vengeance.
And she is not bi-sexual. She's in denial. If she can swing both ways then the swing will snap at one point right? The midpoint is where denial lives. and thats where she is.
As for moose...well.. i hear moose and think antlers and droppings. He'll be sorry he ever hit you.
Love. Love is fickle. Kinda like women. Good thing you gave them up for now :P
It was like the prince coming to save the Rupunzal and pulling out her hair or worse yet waxing it.
It was like Cinderella getting athlete foot
Sleeping beauty getting date raped
HAHAHAAA!!!
Fickle indeed....no harm in remaining chaste.
As for Moose...i keep picturing that big blonde guy from the Archie comics :S
Anyways..the bastard will get whats coming to him, i think...
Your stories have a way of making me fall over my bed in pure laughter.
Wise choice - no women.
Waiting for the next post, think you might have just brough back my days of fan girl fiction back...
Uh Oh.
funny thing. in shrek III rapunzel's hair actually does fall off :P aand the real sleeping beauty. like the real story not the disney fairy tale one. prince charming does just kiss her. he rapes her. well not rapes her. but ya. "makes love" to her :P aaand i think she wakes up with a kid in her hand or smfn like that.
None of the fairy tales are all that nice.
They are all gruesome- Involve sex, rape- its all very disturbing stuff-
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