Hysum's Seven

Before I die I want to do the following things

- Win an Oscar

- Write a bestseller

- Write a chart topping song

- Win the noble peace award

- Take over the world

- Lose my virginity

- Make sure it stays lost

- Plan and take part in the mostly elaborate bank robbery ever conceived by man

I have a three month vacation before start of university so I am going to take this time to full fill as many of these aspirations as possible I am now going to start the last one. So it is keeping this in mind that I present to you-

Hysum's Seven

THE GAMe

To steal hundred million dollars from the mark

THE PLAYERs

- Hysum

- Azmi

- Fabio

- Foxxy lady

- The toad

- The hobo

- Cowabanga

THE MARk

- THE RICHEST MAN ON EARTH ------------------SANTA CLAUSE--------------

A HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS

SEVEN PEOPLE

SEVEN EQUAL SHARES

YOU DO THE MATH

THe JUSTIFICATIOn

Santa clause is the richest man on earth; he just sits on his fat ass all year long and reels in the money. He makes most of his money through Santa's in the mall and on the streets who ask for money for "charity". He does give presents to children but he is very prejudiced against "bad" children. The gifts he gives are provided by evil corporate sponsors who use the gifts to brain wash the children. Santa clause is an evil man as he practices animal cruelty; he beats his old and sick reindeers, who are past their age of retirement he also uses the elves as slaves to do his dirty work. The man is evil but you will never find any evidence of this as he burns all the paper work (dear Santa letters), the man is so good at what he does that many question his very existence the man is slick and sly, he works very quietly, behind the mask of a jolly old man lives an evil son of a bitch.

THE PLAn

The plan is simple. The players pool in all their money together and buy lottery tickets, after we win we will use this money to finance our little con job. The toad will infiltrate Santa's kingdom posing as an elf (considering the fact that she is so good at lying). She will be our inside man, she will provide the information regarding his daily routine and the layout of his hide out.

On D day the hobo will seduce Santa using cookies and milk. Once Santa is out of the picture Fabio will use his "oh so hot butt" to melt through the ice doors of the magical kingdom (North Pole not Disneyland). Fabio will then stealthily enter the factory of toys, using his uber white skin to camouflage against the white snow.

Once he is inside he will send the signal to Hysum who will enter the premises disguised as Santa. (The disguise will include a mustache and beard made using Foxxy ladies hair and in place of Santa's stomach will be Azmi rolled up in a ball). Hysum will enter into Santa's office and plant Cowabanga there for surveillance.

Hysum will go to the vault, empty out Azmi from his stomach and together they will fill the big red bag with the loot.

Cowabanga will signal Foxxy lady when Santa will return to his office. Foxxy lady will enter (hopefully her parents will allow her) and seduce Santa forcing him to follow her into the vault where Hysum and Azmi will capture him and tie him up in another big red bag.

At this point the Hobo and Fabio will sabotage Santa's super sleigh.

And the toad will inform all elves that Santa is gone and they can now escape. Using the ensuing chaos as a smokescreen all the players will escape and ride out into the sunset on penguin backs.

The board is set

The pieces are moving

ARE YOU IN OR ARE YOU OUT?