What plato forgot

I was resting the cushions of my subtle behind on the feng shuily appropraitte seating arrangements of my brick laden dwelling place. The ambience of my paint drenched room seeped through my nimble body, making its way down the confines of my very being. My primary care giver crossed the threshold to enter into my space. She handed to me a device constructed to clip the hard proteinified shells on the edges of my organ of manipulation and sensation found in the hands of humans and other primates, as the cutting device made an incision at the arc of my protiensfied shell, I was overcome by philosophical ponderings persistently plundering the pool of my passionate psyche, blood pumping through my pulse I proclaimed provocatively, why isn’t it called Punal? Are our protein shells just a metaphor for the absurdity of how we ignorantly Christian names that have too few syllables. Why use a single syballed word like sex, when it can be replaced by popularly passive words like Punal. It’s the same with cutting nails, why call it cutting nails when one can more effectively elevate its syllables by calling it nailcuttingdomaitall. It is a question for the ages, one that will haunt every fiber of my being every time I pamper the epitome of organism that is me.

Lines

I have photographic memory, the problem is none of my memories are very photogenic.

There is a theory that man was once ape, there is another theory that man is still ape only too drunk to notice.

'I write for the dyslexic'.

'show me your palm, you have a very long love line'
"came with the penis"

If at first you dont succeed, get a woman to do it.

I didnt fall in love, I first fell- had internal head injury- and oddly enough thats when the love bit happened.

I am an ordinary man with extraordinary curcumsizes

Some people rant as if they menstruating from the mouth

When I grow up, I want to be dead

Love and Punani are two different things- love for Punani is Devret

I know I love you because I would love you even if I didn’t have a penis

I am gonna kick yours ass, but first, I am gonna sodomize you, otherwise my kicks wont hurt much

OUCHIE

See if you can spot the difference between these two statements:
(a) "Those trouser make your behind look fat."
(b) "You're a repellently obese old hag upon whom I am compelled to heap insults and derision - depressingly far removed from the, 'stupid, squeaky, sLuty women,' who make up my vast catalogue of former lovers and to whom I might as well return right now as I hate everything about you."



I think you know what this blogpost is about- WOMEN, GIRLFRIENDS in paticular (no honey, not you, I am talking about all those other women)- Just something most men would relate to get started- I of course don’t relate to this ('really honey, you look great , whatever you are wearing)

Also, to show my Girlfriend there are no hard feelings, I have replicated her style of writing, I have of course messed with it a little and made it my own (by which I mean used a much worse vocabulary).

I was watching Mission Impossible and it was making me uneasy. Tom Cruise was doing something - infiltrating, probably, you know what he's like - and he was continuously describing the situation to his distant support buddies via his headset radio. For a while, I naturally assumed that it was simply Tom Cruise's big nose that was unsettling me and tried, using soothing visualizations and breathing exercises, to move myself, mentally, to a place where it wasn't an issue. But then - the realization freezing my arm and abruptly halting a crisp's journey from lung to mouth - I had a small epiphany: This was me- nose not withstanding, Dangling from a string, trying to infiltrate this, impossible to infiltrate 'computer' (a machine who does not look fat in any kind of cloths).

I, the super spy- am somehow supposed to infiltrate the super- computer, while relating my every move to my support buddy- My support Buddy of course being my girl-friend herself.

Before I continue on I think everyone should- sometimes women will communicate to you their feelings- The key to a successful relationship is communication. That's the First Rule. BUT (there’s always a BUT) every girlfriends corollary to the First Rule is the Timing clause. This states that the best time to initiate a complex and lengthy talk about, say, what trivial thing is important to them takes place only when (in reverse order of preference):
- When you see that BOYFRIEND is playing a game online and is one point away from becoming Champion Of The World.
- Boyfriend is racing out of take a much needed toilet break
- Boyfriend is in the middle of trying to put out a kitchen fire, etc.
- During the final minutes of a tense thriller Boyfriend has been watching for the past two hours. Ideally at the precise point when someone has begun to say, 'Good Lord! Then the murderer must be...'.
- In the middle of the moment when Boyfriend is feeling particularly amorous.

Okay I am tired now- but this is far from over, Guess I will have to do a sequel to this post. Well tht will come next week- I havent even completed my first point yet. Whatever- look for the next update.

OH and- BRING ON THE HATE MAIL

YUM

The say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, well people- its time I opened your eyes to the truly Good looking men in the world.

Note: This list is of celebrities, movie stars- so if your name isn’t included don’t be peeved- Faisal, you and Azmi are quite beautiful men too.

Note many of these people go across categories but I haven’t repeated their names

Sigh… BEAUTIFUL

1- Johnny Depp

2- James Dean

3- Gael Garcia Bernal-

WOW… So charming

1- George Clooney

2- Hugh grant

3- John Cusack

Whoa… Alpha man

1- Jason Stratham

2- Clive Owen

3- Russell Crowe

*faints*- the old and the Beautiful

1- Clint Eastwood

2- Jack Nicholson

3- Paul Newman

I only gave space for three in each category and they are no particular order, Also I did not make a list of Hot men as three spaces wouldn’t do them justice. But it is quite obvious all the men mentioned above are also Hot.